One of the singular mysteries of the modern world is how on earth did pineapples manage to adapt to growing on sidewalks and concrete. Or maybe this is just pineapple is tough as nails. This is taking express pineapple to the limits. While you are waiting for the bus, why not munch on some pineapple?
Just remember to bring along your chisel and core drill because you’re going to need them for this drain cover accompanied by a clump of grass. If we ever knew an undercover drain cover, it was this one. Cards on the table, this isn’t one of the most convincing pictures on the list. What probably happened is that some passerby saw the potential with the grass growing that way, and painted it yellow. Hey, still fun!
Fluffy Flour
Imagine kneading your dough, and all of a sudden, it starts purring! Take one very, very white cat, place it in a mixing bowl and leave the mixture to settle. And by settle, we mean to fall asleep.
This fiendish feline took the opportunity of sleeping in the very inopportune space of a mixing bowl. It's well known that cats love to sleep in tight spaces, the downside is that they don't know what they're getting themselves into. One could easily mistake the bundle of fur for a pure-white heap of flour. If it were not for its face titled upwards, any hapless baker would have thrown in the eggs and oil!
Rock-Hard Raspberry Cake
Ensure to have dentures alongside your cake fork when taking a bite out of this rock-hard slice of raspberry cheesecake because your teeth will not appreciate this dessert! Layers of what appear to be gooey, creamy cheesecake goodness with blobs of raspberry jam are actually agate.
Agate is a type of rock that comes in a range of colors, some of which can be very deceptive at first glance. In the future, before sinking your teeth into that cake at dessert, give it a few taps with your cake fork because teeth do not grow back! You have to admit, though, it looks tempting.
Crunchy Pancakes
You would be forgiven if you thought this stack of fluffy, golden pancakes was a little stale. And why on earth is the butter crunchy? Screw the lid back on your jar of maple syrup because no matter how much you pour, this pinecone will not taste any better!
A creative (or possibly very bored) hiker spotted a pinecone that resembled a stack of tiny pancakes. To complement the deceiving image, they folded a golden leaf into a square resembling butter. It's pretty clever, and definitely seems like a mirage-in-the-desert situation. Let us hope the next hungry hiker to pass by isn’t deceived!
Crispy Cat Bread
If there is one thing we are assured of, it is that cats should best be kept as far away from bakeries as possible! This has nothing to do with health and safety codes, though. Nor is it because we think they might eat the inventory (although that shouldn't be discounted). Ultimately, it's because you might reach for your pan to pop in the oven and, lo and behold, your dough starts moving and meowing.
It's just due to the fact just how often our feline friends can resemble baked goods! This ginger tabby tucked itself up so well into this planter it resembles a crispy, freshly baked baguette.
Rockcorn
A show of hands to reveal our ages: Who remembers the character Rockbiter from “The Neverending Story?” For the 80s kids who can easily recall the reference, Rockbiter might be the only one to enjoy this popcorn!
A tourist found these very peculiar-looking piles of popcorn strewn on the beach in the Canary Islands. Luckily, the tourist didn’t grab the salt but instead realized the “popcorn” was actually dead coral that had washed ashore. We wonder if it's sites like these where props departments find their best products. Although, we imagine the cast wouldn't be too happy, no matter how talented they are.
Sneaky Serpent Bananas
Any person reaching for a quick snack of these seemingly benign bananas will be in for a shock, either when the banana opens its eyes or, even worse, bites back! Now, one clue that these aren't bananas could be that bananas usually don't grow wrapped around tree branches, and banana trees typically grow many bunches, not just one.
This is actually the “green tree python” and it has a fantastic camouflage trick for the younger snakes: the ability to blend in with ripe bananas. This camouflage does not last a lifetime, though. Once the python has matured, its skin turns a brilliant green.
Jellyless Beans!
There is no jelly in these beans! These impostor jelly beans will deliver a somewhat crunchy surprise (and a very costly dentist appointment) for anyone hapless enough to start chewing before inspecting them.
These tiny, bean-shaped stones are the result of centuries of polishing and erosion in the rough tidal waves of the coast of Massachusetts. The sparkling stones are present in a variety of colors – which makes them seem even more palatable than they would if they were just a dull old grey. Still, even though we know they're stones, it somehow doesn't entirely take away the appeal of popping one in your mouth...
Paper Thin Tortilla
Do not jump to the conclusion that you have all the ingredients for your perfect Mexican feast. You might want to make sure your tortilla is actually a tortilla before you start throwing in your rice, beans, and guacamole and squirting lime juice all over it.
You would be better off opening this tortilla and reading it! A very talented individual took the time to make this book cover from paper that will eventually appear as aged leather. From deceptive tortilla to deceptive beef jerky? We admit, maybe this isn't the most convincing item on this list, and anyone who tried to eat it probably won't be going to Harvard anytime soon.
Croissant of the Woods
You may have heard of “chicken of the woods,” a type of mushroom that resembles chicken meat. Aficionados even report that when cooked correctly, it slices and peels the same way chicken skin would. Well, maybe you want to pair that up with the croissant of the woods.
There must be a baker in the forest because sitting on the forest floor is a crispy, fluffy croissant. One bite of it will make it evident that you have sunk your teeth into the Ganoderma mushroom – a mushroom almost identical to a croissant! And good news, this mushroom has a number of health benefits and has even been used in folk medicine over the years.
Bitter Muffin
We are sure the forest tries its best to trick us with a variety of tempting yet highly unpalatable tricks. Spare a thought for those with a sweet tooth who are strolling through the woods when all of a sudden, their sugar craving is triggered upon seeing a delectable cupcake perched on a tree log.
Juicy berries appear to be sitting in a layer of rich, creamy icing sugar. Refrain from scooping this muffin and wolfing it down because you’ll be consuming “hydnellum peckii” - a very peculiar-looking fungus! Honestly, learning what this really is kind of turns our stomachs. Sure, we didn't actually expect to find a cupcake in the woods (and if we did, we'd be very nervous about a certain witch nearby), but looking at it through these lenses is just icky.
Pulled Pork
If we look up and down this list, almost anyone could be forgiven for putting some of these strange items in their mouths. And we definitely will not blame you for chewing on this unappetizing pile of what appears to be pulled pork. A pile of stringy, chunky wood chips almost perfectly resembles pulled pork!
To make this whole thing even more confusing, these chips of wood are used to help smoke and cure meats. Do not be confused with the actual meats and the wood chips during the process, though! This is not the fiber your doctor was talking about!
Laundry Day Cheese
Has doing load after load of laundry left you feeling a bit peckish? Feel like a toasted cheese and tomato sandwich? Perhaps the laundry detergents can help if you do not have any cheese on hand in your refrigerator. If you do not mind the soapy taste, that is...
While shaving laundry soap, this person found that the shavings looked almost identical to grated cheese. It's actually a common marketing tactic to use non-food items that resemble food items in commercials and pictures. That's because the non-food item is a lot more durable and easy to maneuver. Now let’s hope they did not get confused and actually add cheese to their washing and soap to their sandwich!
Giant Burrito
It would be incredibly difficult for anyone to refuse a burrito at the best times. Now imagine if that burrito was three times the size of a regular old burrito. Even harder to say no, right? Well, any discerning foodie might want to take a few moments to assess their eating choices. Now, is it on the floor? Yes, but if you ignore that, it's still looking pretty appealing.
While this may look like a humungous burrito with a gently toasted wrap, we have bad news. It is, in fact, an old, stained sheet. Let's not even ask what the stains are. Just put your knife and fork away.
Sunny Side Down
How kind of this host – it appears they have preempted their guest’s fried egg cravings and gone ahead and cooked a fried egg out on the bathroom sink! It's hard to find real friends like this these days. Yeah, if none of that makes sense, do not worry as, hopefully, nobody is cooking eggs on bathroom sinks!
This person found their friend’s soap on its stone soap holder looked exactly like a sunny-side-up egg dish. Hopefully, a toothbrush was on hand because if this person took a bite, it would be no “yolk!” Ah, we "crack" ourselves up sometimes.
Noodles From Hell
Do we need a pair of chopsticks for some tantalizing ramen or a heavy-duty fork to twirl up this steaming angel hair spaghetti? If there is any intention to eat this swirly mass, it would best be to put on welders' gloves.
A tree that set alight (possibly due to a lightning strike) revealed a very unusual pattern beneath its smoldering bark – almost seeming like a giant bowl of spaghetti or noodles. The image caused quite a sensation on the internet when it first made an appearance, with some calling it “cursed spaghetti!” Cursed or not, it is pretty tantalizing.
The Colonel Does Not Approve
We wonder if eleven herbs and spices from a certain colonel would help hide the true nature of this piece of fried chicken. Feel free to add any sort of condiment and spices to it, but it certainly will not help with the taste, the chipped teeth, or the digestive issues that will undoubtedly follow!
This piece of juicy-looking fried chicken is solid calcite, a very common mineral formation on rocks. The many bumps and lumps resemble breaded fried chicken. It will make you do a double-take on your beach stroll, but we can definitely confirm this is NOT finger-licking good!
The Purring Turkey
Guests at the Thanksgiving dinner table would not be questioned if they asked, “Why is this turkey meowing?” A family’s sphinx cat, who is famously hairless, was snapped in this, what some might call, compromising pose! Sphinx cats are, let's be honest, weird-looking creatures. We mean, how many animals could you accidentally confuse for a plucked turkey?
As the cat groomed itself, it tucked its head between its legs, creating the illusion of a de-feathered, raw turkey, complete with skinny turkey legs sticking right out! Make sure the cranberry sauce and mashed potatoes stay FAR away from the family pet over Thanksgiving!
No Wine From These Grapes
Lay back, and enjoy the gentle breeze wafting from the palm tree leaf being fanned in your direction while a loyal servant feeds you succulent, purple grapes. The first bite of these grapes, though, would cause instant agony and an immediate questioning of your servants’ loyalties!
Botryoidal Chalcedony, most commonly found in Morocco, is a type of quartz rock that forms into almost perfect round nodules. The mineral joins other clusters of these little rock balls as it grows. Grouped together, this particular growth looked like a bunch of grapes. These rocks are gorgeous, and a talented jeweler could turn them into a delicious necklace or set of earrings.
Your Teeth Are at Steak
Whoah, this gives a whole new meaning to “marbled” beef! While this looks like a cut of prime steak, the first attempt to cut it should deter any meat lover from trying to consume it. This rock, when split open, looks identical to grade A rump steak, complete with deep red coloring.
Some have said that this may be a hoax, and the type of rock it is has not been identified. We do wonder who would go to the lengths to paint a rock to look like a steak. Plus, we get there are loads of people who can do hyper-realistic paintings and fool us, but this looks like the real deal, don't you think?
The Sleeping Butter
In this image, we see a creamy, milky white dollop of butter deliciously dripped onto a warm slice of toast. It appears to melt across the crunchy, crispy bread. Upon further inspection, however, any butter-loving foodie can confirm that no butter has whiskers!
A family’s snow-white cat lays like a blob of butter over its bed, which itself is made to look like a slice of toast, just to further add to the deception. We wonder if this family saw the cat bed in the store and saw the potential for this image, or if it was just dumb luck that this worked out so well.
Succulent Candy
These juicy candies take the description “succulent” a little too seriously! An assortment of perfect, teardrop-shaped candies is clumped together in this highly misguiding image. The first clue should be that they seem to be sprouting from a thick clod of earth. Looking a little closer, it becomes evident that they are leaves!
This curiously colored succulent plant has its leaves sparkle in a burst of rainbow colors. A single bite will confirm that these are no sugary morsels but instead the bitter blobs of a succulent plant. They're like the Skittles of nature, but you better keep this rainbow away from little kids.
Crafty Caramel
Before we ruin this for everyone, a show of hands who has a severe hankering for salted caramel all of a sudden? Few things in this world are as delicious as creamy dulce de leche. Biting into a rich chocolate cupcake only to find a caramelly center? Heaven help us! Salivate over this image for a second (or as long as your tastebuds can hold out) before glancing down at the container.
The gooey, silky caramel would be almost too much to resist until the packaging reveals itself. Is a petroleum company now in the business of producing caramel? Nope! Look again: it’s engine grease! We bet that the tastebuds are feeling a LOT less excited now!
We See the Ice – Where's the Cream?
We are afraid to inform all you ice cream fans out there that this is all ice... and no cream! What appears to be a mouth-watering image of cookies and cream ice cream will most certainly have no place in any ice cream parlor.
Whip out your magnifying glass and have a close inspection: those are not spoon scoops but are instead car tire tracks! We hoped nobody was cruel enough to drive through a giant mound of cookies and cream, and we were correct: this is snow, ice, and rocks! Okay, so maybe the footstep gave it away that this wasn't edible to begin with - just maybe.
Cheesy Housecleaning
This might just be our favorite sneaky snack yet! We guarantee you there will be no cheesy orange powder to lick off your fingers after you are done snacking on this “treat.” In all honesty, we would be surprised if you could do anything after devouring these “chips!”
Rows of scrumptious cheesy chips peek out of this cardboard wrap. At first touch, though, it will be evident that this is cloth. And not just any fabric, but microfiber used to clean cars! Why did they have to make them such a tempting color?! We guess it draws the eye; maybe it's good marketing to trick your consumers.
Pretzels for the Pixies
We are now sure that the woods are just totally messing with us at this point. What inspired the forest to replicate one of the most iconic shapes of the twentieth century: the humble pretzel. Sadly, these pretzels will squelch right out of any curious fingers. And we bet they are not even salted.
Hemitrichia Serpula is a type of fungus that has decided to mess with every Oktoberfest lover by forming itself in the exact same shape as the beloved bar snack. You have to admit, this one is crazy! If you walked by this in a forest, you'd for sure be confused and snapping pictures right away.
Infernal Cheese
Are you looking for a cheese and tomato sandwich? Bring the tomatoes and bread, and we will bring this block of mischievous cheese! Layer upon layer of gooey cheese sits in a steamy stack in this tricky picture.
One might notice the iron tongs holding the stack together. There is a reason they are cast iron: this is a block of molten metal! The soft orange color combined with the lines makes it appear as if it is ready to make the ULTIMATE toasted sandwich! It may not be the best sandwich you ever eat, but it will be the last...
Georgia Makes the Best Doners
A little-known fact about the Republic of Georgia: it has giant doner kebabs just out on the street for anyone to slice a slice from. There you are, sightseeing, backpacking through town, when all of a sudden, you spot it standing tall in the middle of the pavement: a juicy block of kebab meat. Gon on, take a bite!
Actually, hold that thought. Does the winter air make you suspicious? No! It’s a free kebab! Hopes (and tastebuds) are severely crushed when it turns out to be an old tree trunk inexplicably impaled on a pole! We really couldn't find the history for this, but it certainly is a fun landmark, we guess.
Heavy Equipment Chocolate
This corporate branding has gone extreme! A machinery company that specializes in earth moving equipment now appears to have launched a line of...chocolate. These chocolate bars come complete with the company’s logo stamped on them, so you make no mistake. We've all seen the videos on social media of master chocolatiers making hyper-realistic items out of chocolate, so we've definitely got trust issues looking at this.
Should this be Catbury? Or a Kit-Cat? Instead, do a drop test rather than a taste test on these untrustworthy bars, as it is not chocolate slabs but rather slabs of metal!
This Beer Leaves Your Mouth Feeling Fresh
This is some *crafty* beer! Ambrosian, golden liquid sits chilled in a beer mug, beads of condensation forming around the glass. What could be more inviting on a scorching summer day than feeling the crisp, cool taste of this beer flowing into your mouth?
Well, we hope your mouth is the furthest point this “beer” will reach, as it is no beer but rather a well-known mouthwash! How does it get foamy, you ask? We wondered the same but decided it best to leave those sorts of questions unanswered. Imagine being at a frat party and handing a glass of this stuff to the biggest d-bag there. It wouldn't be kind, but it would be funny.
Sidewalk Snack
There is an Italian proverb, “Chi ha il pane non ha i denti, chi ha i denti non ha il pane.” If translated, it says, “he who has bread has no teeth, and who has teeth has no bread.” We’re not sure exactly of the origins, but we’re guessing it has something to do with this bread.
This bread might look delicious, but there is not all that much flour to these bread-looking rocks. That’s right. These are just rocks. And you might want to remember the Italian proverb if you walk on this sidewalk in a particularly hungry state.
Extra Chewy Pasta
After people were surveyed and asked their favorite choice of pasta, it turns out that linguine is one of the world’s favorites. We’re not all surprised looking at these delicious pieces.
But, if you are keen on some bolognese or alfredo for lunch, you might have to spend longer than 9 minutes on these “linguine” noodles to get that “al dente” effect. Considering that these are nothing more than deceptive rubber bands, you’re looking at waiting a whole lifetime to get them “al dente” and ready for your pasta dish. This would make for some real chewy pasta, and an awkward "Lady and the Tramp" remake.
Caramel That Creeps
This must be the forest where Hansel and Gretel lived. We’re also not too convinced that we’re coming home after finding these delectable growing caramel chunks. The birds can eat the bread pieces for all they like.
We’re going to have us some divine caramel. After all, it must be some generous and kindly supernatural source growing caramel in the forest. That’s right. They’re growing. And they’re not caramel. What you’re licking your chops to here is nothing else than some wild fungi. We urge you to count how many items on this list end up being fungi, and then go enjoy your dinner.
Alert Avocados
We all know that avocados are the number one fish, food, or ingredient for every vegetarian and vegan in the globe. Just not these avocados. They’re neither vegan nor vegetarian-friendly. Take your toast out of the toaster. Sorry to be the bearers of bad news (again), but put your lemon juice back in the fridge.
We hate to disappoint, but these are not walking avocadoes; they’re turtles whose shells are covered in what looks like a layer of algae. It's pretty impressive how convincing they look. These turtles better go to the local car wash before hungry vegetarians and basic white girls come their way.
I Scream, You Scream, “It’s Fake!”
There is nothing worse than coming across these tubs of delicious creaminess on a hot summer’s day. The good news is that this new brand of “ice cream” is free of lactose and gluten and vegan-friendly as well. If you’re on a diet, they’re ideal too.
That's because if you have even just one bite, you’re not going to have any more. Yep, that’s right. This is a specific resin used for damaged wood. Too bad your tongue is going to need a different kind of resin or filler once you’re finished linking on a scoop of these. Buyer beware, is all we can say.
Attack of the Giant Broccoli
Your kids are lucky you don’t show them a picture of this veggie. Getting them to have a bite of the green vegetable is hard enough. But they might not have the courage for this 40-foot specimen. Fortunately, this broccoli-looking tree is safe enough for your kids.
We don’t imagine they’re going to touch it, let alone build a tree house in it. But you know who the real danger here is? One word: bunnies. Let’s hope this camouflaged tree doesn’t encounter any hungry wild rabbits. A 40-foot broccoli – even if it is a tree – might just make their day.
Don’t Mess
You’re probably ready to mop up your plate. After you’re done with this one, you won’t be able to spot one crumb or morsel lying around. That’s literally what you will get after you indulge in one of these. While this might look like 100% of the most quality raw ground beef, what’s really inside this packaging is a free-range mop.
That’s right. After you purchase one of these things, every crumb and morsel will be mopped up. Except that you might have to get something else for lunch because these are nothing but the synthetic fibers of household mops.
Camouflaged Clay
Are you tired of diets that don’t work? Do you still want to indulge in chocolate but hate putting on the pounds? Introducing new “Camouflaged Clay.” One bite of these and your cravings will be put to rest for the remainder of your life. It is both effective for dieting and economical.
The good news is that you might never buy a bar of chocolate again. You might be put off for life. The bad news is that you may need a trip to the emergency room if you ingest this stuff. Perhaps, you had better do your chocolate shopping at a supermarket instead of a hardware store.
Express Pineapple
One of the singular mysteries of the modern world is how on earth did pineapples manage to adapt to growing on sidewalks and concrete. Or maybe this is just pineapple is tough as nails. This is taking express pineapple to the limits. While you are waiting for the bus, why not munch on some pineapple?
Just remember to bring along your chisel and core drill because you’re going to need them for this drain cover accompanied by a clump of grass. If we ever knew an undercover drain cover, it was this one. Cards on the table, this isn't one of the most convincing pictures on the list. What probably happened is that some passerby saw the potential with the grass growing that way, and painted it yellow. Hey, still fun!
The Perfect Diet Donut
Who said that donuts were bad for you? In fact, with this guilt-free donut, you can have all you can eat with your morning coffee. Brought to you just by nature. Growing in a damp, dark spot in this local forest, you can munch on this donut.
This is another example of - you guessed it - fungi looking confusing and deceptive! No matter the diet you follow – whether you’re banting or vegan – if you include these mushroom-looking donuts, you won’t be cheating. We did mention that they’re mushrooms. Not exactly the treat you had in mind, but at least you won’t be cheating on your diet.
Cheeto Cast
We might all start injuring ourselves to get our hands or legs on one of these new Cheeto-type casts. Just don’t let the children see this pooch when it gets back from the vet, or else the dog might be surprised to see it is not the only one who loves gnawing on bones.
Those little kids will be let down. This is not a giant Cheeto but a bright orange cast. The giveaway here might be that there is a dog attached to the end of it. This neon orange cast might put a damper on the kids’ spirit, but at least it will brighten this hound’s day.
Pancakes in a Bottle
You’ve heard of cake in a mug and cake in a jar, so it is not all that surprising that you will find pancakes in a bottle. What’s great about this product is that it comes with complimentary condiments. Well, those complimentary condiments are not exactly the finest maple syrup, but fresh balsamic vinegar.
And the items you believed were sweet mini pancakes are globs of yeast. Doesn't this look insane? This has to be one of the trippiest items on this list. For now, pancakes in a bottle are not yet a thing, but at least you have some balsamic vinegar for your green salad.
Suspicious Sponge
This might be a hard fact to chew – and that’s not because the bread is stale – but what you’re looking at is not a slice of bread nor a piece of cake, but a sponge. Although, we’re pretty sure that this is where the inventor of the sponge cake got inspiration from.
It would be easy for anyone to glance at this sink and do a double-take. What is bread doing on there? Well, we can definitely make a bet that this sponge goes very well with a dollop of fresh cream. Just don’t eat it. Odd as it seems, you will find it better to shave with this slice of sponge.
Ham Supreme
What a ham this cat certainly is. It really did pick an odd location to sleep in. But is it true that cats are known for sleeping in odd places? This one will learn its lesson not to sleep on the netted window liner after it spots hungry-looking humans staring up at it.
For now, this cat rests obliviously, unaware that its hind looks like furry fresh smoked ham. Fortunately, no one will want to get a mouth full of orange fur or a belly full of orange cat, but this cat does make a delicious-looking ham! The little paw adds to the cuteness, albeit not the culinary appeal.
Fresh Breath
These mints might look sweet enough with their cute smiling faces, but they’re not something you’re likely to want to freshen your breath after a meal. In fact, they’re not edible. What you’re looking at is towels packaged into super convenient and super deceptive-looking rows.
The good news is that at least you can use them to dry off your hands after you clean your hands in the finger bowl. As cute and neat as they might seem, they’re disappointingly not mints. Now, the way these work is that you pour hot water over them and they expand into moist napkins. This presents the second test, which is to realize that they are NOT fun rice-based treats, like some of us have done in the past.
Convenient Hardware Sushi
Maki, sashimi, and nigiri have taken off. Not only can you find all the varieties of sushi in restaurants across the globe, in convenience or take-out stores, but even now at your local hardware. For those of you who are not into raw fish, you might think the world’s gone crazy.
However, for those of you who are crazy about sushi, you will think yourself crazy if you tuck into one of these. What you see is not sushi sold at hardware stores but paint rollers disguising themselves at sushi. Once you use these bad boys, there's no mistaking what they are. You've just got to make it long enough without anybody trying to tuck in.
Something’s Up With This Sundae
Now, we all know a very famous fast-food franchise has problems with their ice cream. It is not the ice cream, but more specifically, their ice cream machines breaking down. Now, we finally know why.
We sincerely hope this is not a new product line the fast-food chain is trying out. Well, who knows? Maybe there is a market out there that’s into frog sundaes. It does look like this little guy fell into a vat of vanilla ice cream with chocolate fudge sauce, and hasn't had a chance to clean up yet. But, to be honest, this just doesn’t seem the right kind of day for ice cream. Better give this one a skip… or hop.
Impasta!
It’s hard to keep up with all the different types of pasta. There are the ones we all know, like spaghetti, macaroni, and linguine. Then, there are those fancy ones like stellini, conchiglie, and tortellini. And now there is this new variety, plasticilini or fakopastini. And, to be fair, uncooked pasta might as well be plastic.
No matter how much you like Italian cuisine, we can definitely say you should not experiment with this one. Sadly, it is neither Italian nor is it pasta. These pieces are nothing other than plastic shavings. And no matter how delicious the sauce, you won’t feel well after ingesting some of these.
Frozen Pastry
Frozen pastry producers are really coming up with fascinating products! Just one of these pastry snows, and you won’t need anything else for Christmas lunch. They might not keep you filled for that long, but you will be plenty hydrated.
Those pastry companies may be creative with their designs, but they’re skimping on the ingredients: just fluffy frozen water, ice, and last night’s snowflakes. If you’re lucky, you might find some stray leaves and twigs blown courtesy of the wind. We're not sure how exactly this shape was formed, but it does look like a great contender at a county fair pie contest.
Highway Omelette
This high-speed chef ensures that no eggs are scrambled! Scattered across the highway appear to be perfectly fried, sunny-side-up eggs. A perfect egg white splats against the tarmac while a shimmering yellow yolk sits on top.
Who wants to risk cars traveling at 75 miles an hour to have breakfast? Do not risk your life for this buffet, as these are reflective lane markers – helping cars navigate lanes in the dark of night. Still, in the daytime, we bet this confuses a number of drivers and perhaps causes them to lose focus momentarily because THERE ARE FRIED EGGS IN THE STREET.
Kinder Surprise – The Tennis Edition
This is a highly suspicious-looking Easter egg. First off, it seems to be inside out. Secondly, it is broken into a dozen different pieces. And thirdly, most suspicious of all, the chocolate is sticking to a very fibrous, green felt... Now, that could just be one of those impressive realistic cake things. Or maybe not.
Hopefully, the unfortunate consumer does not realize halfway through their dessert that this is, in fact, a tennis ball turned inside out. The first thing that would have made us toss it aside is not finding a toy inside once cracking it open! Also, it was probably pretty chewy.
Breakfast…the Hard Way
Eggs are the quintessential food for breakfast. And the one you’re looking at might be the most delicious-looking egg you’ve ever seen. While it may be the most delicious-looking egg, you’d only be disappointed by this one. What you’re looking at is a crystal carved in the shape of an egg. That’s why it is super shiny.
This egg may not be suitable to break your fast on. You’d only probably break a fork in the process, and likely a couple of teeth. But, luckily it does double up as a pretty crystal. Wonder what healing powers egg crystals have?
Secret Pineapple
This might be the strangest looking pineapple in the most unexpected place – in the lining of the earpiece of your headphones – but it is not a pineapple. This is really a fruity headset design – one we don’t recommend around hungry people.
After putting in a long shift or staying up gaming into the night, you might be a bit forgiven for nibbling on your headset earpiece. It does look oddly like a pineapple. Just be careful of the foam – it does not at all live up to the tangy taste of pineapple, nor does it have the same texture.
All Purpose …Fruit Juice?
You have to admit that product experimentation is just getting ridiculous. This feels like creative marketing gone wrong. Walking past this all-purpose cleaner, you don’t know if you should take it to the next family barbecue or buy some in bulk for the next punch for an all-night party.
And what makes it that much worse is that it has pictures of fresh fruit on the packaging. We’re sure plenty of peeps have turned up at barbecues and have poured all-purpose cleaner and soap into their beer mugs. The good news, then, is at least there is no washing up after.
Lethal Caviar
You’re bound to have a stomachache if you have a mouthful of this caviar. Fish eggs tend to be a rich meal, but this lot here is probably the zestiest you will find. In fact, here you have a spoonful of lead pellets.
While it might look good enough to munch on, it is about a fraction of the price and the quality and only good for filling up your pellet gun – not your stomach. Unless you’d like to add a few holes to your belly, and a trip to the emergency room. That is certainly one of the more extreme ways to diet.
Levitating Ice Cream Sandwich
Who doesn’t love ice cream sandwiches? We mean, it's a sandwich with ice cream, and who doesn't love a treat on the go? It seems the ice cream sandwich in the photo is either chocolate or caramel flavor. Nope, it’s foam flavor? That’s right. It might only take a few seconds to realize what this really is, but at first glance, it's a little confusing.
Sadly, this ice cream sandwich is only good for sitting on. And even more sadly, there are no real levitating ice cream sandwiches. Just tattered old chairs that are like oases to ice cream lovers. On another note, this venue really needs to look into getting new chairs.
The Freshest Smelling Popsicle
This popsicle should be used in those “guess-the-flavor” campaigns. I’m guessing this one is either bubblegum, blueberry, or raspberry. One clue to guessing the flavor is that this popsicle will keep you feeling fresh on the hottest days of summer. Another clue is it won’t be pleasant to munch on. And that’s because it is not bubblegum but antiperspirant flavor.
That’s right; this popsicle is really one of those new chic roll-ons. We can recommend applying this to your armpits to stay cool. Although, you should definitely avoid licking it – even if it resembles a delicious and refreshing blueberry popsicle.
Antibacterial Fruit Juice?
We have always known that fruit juice is good for you and a better alternative to soft drinks, but we never knew it was this good for you! We mean, when did they start producing anti-bacterial fruit juice? Now, granted, a lot of fruits have natural anti-bacterial qualities in them, but this isn't what we're talking about.
In fact, you can probably wake up feeling fresh the next day if you use this as a mixer instead of regular fruit juice. You will be forgiven for bringing this liquid cleaner to a family lunch. It looks just like orange juice. It even has the same shine that very healthy drinks have.
Asparagus Pasta
Honestly, pasta with asparagus is one of the most delicious meals you’ll ever have. Except this one. While this might look like asparagus served with vermicelli, it’s not. Truthfully, we’re not exactly sure what we’re looking at. It could be a gardening experiment gone wrong. Most likely, it's a collection of grass and plant trimmings from a recent yard clean-up.
It could also be a really experimental vegan dish with stems, lettuce-looking grass, and some foliage for fiber. What we do know is that you should not eat it. No matter how hungry you may be. We’re guessing only a really experimental vegan will enjoy this.
Artistic Meringue
This is the most beautiful-looking meringue. Either a drizzling of caramel or coffee has been added to this meringue. This meringue may look like a piece of art. And it is better if it stays that way. One poke of this dessert, and you’re bound to probe the wrath of a swarm of angry hornets.
That’s right; you’re looking at the artistic glory of one of the most vicious insects. And little wonder. If you were protecting such a beautiful piece of artwork, wouldn’t you blow up into an angry temper and want to inflict pain on the perpetrator? Especially if those perps were trying to eat your home!
Serial Popcorn
You’re probably not going to want to eat after seeing thousands and thousands of detached heads. Sure, they might resemble buttered popcorn, but no one will have an appetite for this huge collection of detached heads? We’re probably looking at least a thousand detached heads.
At first glance, this might look like some buttery popcorn, but the little faces give it away that this is altogether different. It does beg the question – what happened? Did a huge anti-toy mass murder take place? Did the toy owner not find the right face? Or perhaps, is the mass graveyard of outdated and old-fashioned emoticons?
Corncident
This is what happens when a corn cob gets into a fight with some pieces of wood. We’re not exactly sure who won the fight, but judging from the look of the corn, it still looks good to eat. Actually, it’s not corn. It is a mysterious kind of slime mold called Leocarpus.
Considering that it is bright yellow, it’s probably not safe to eat. Better stick to eating corn straight off the cob. You’re much more likely to survive than if you grab a few pieces of Leocarpus. If you didn't know what this was, you would be forgiven for wondering if it's some kind of insect egg - yuck.
This Banquet Rocks
This looks like some feast! It is more than fitting for a king’s brunch or a brunch for some special occasion. You wouldn’t be wrong for thinking it is an important town event. In fact, laid out on the table are the local ‘products’ from an annual mineral event.
That also means that not one thing laid out here is edible. Unless you would like to lose a few teeth in the process. But if you are keen on giving your appendix some work to do, why not grab a seat and tuck in? This one is a bit of a trick because the whole point of the setup is to make this stuff look like food. Still, it's a great party favor.
Nectar of the Gods
There is something wrong with these grapes – they just look too good. No fruit looks this delicious. Can you imagine the wine these grapes produce? It would be like the nectar of the gods. If something makes your mouth salivate this much, you definitely should not eat it. Like these grapes!
These are not just another example of those fake plastic fruit, but rather these have been individually carved from green onyx. These are not fruit. No, instead they are a gorgeous and impressive work of art. Perhaps this bunch of grapes should be displayed in the Met or the Uffizi.
Excuse Me, Waiter….
Excuse me, Waiter, there is a praying mantis in my salad. This praying mantis takes saying grace before a meal quite seriously. The thing is, his prayers might not be effective today, considering that he had landed part of someone’s meal.
Let’s just pray for the praying mantis that the salad-eater is a vegetarian, or else the praying mantis will have to say his last rights. Since they are such gentle creatures, we can almost guess that the salad praying mantis was spared. We don't know about you, but if this happened to us, we would need a good three months before we could touch salad again.
Leave-in Honey
It is well known that beeswax and honey have restorative properties for the hair, but honestly, couldn’t they have made their packaging a bit more obvious? This is another example of when marketing execs get a 'genius' idea that ends up in lawsuits. The last place you are likely to expect this bottle in is in the shower.
Mind you; it might not be such a bad idea if it can double up as a condiment. After you finish your breakfast and tea prepared with leave-in honey, why not jump in the shower with your leave-in honey? In fact, the best kinds of multi-functional products are those you can also eat.
Precious Pomegranate
As delicious as these look, we can promise you that you will not enjoy munching on them. This handful of pomegranate seeds is actually glass beads attached to wires generally used in jewelry and clothing design. So, as delicious and intriguing as they may look, you cannot eat them.
However, we are pretty sure that models who have been on the runway all day, or rather waiting to approach the runway, are tempted to start nibbling at their outfits containing these glass beads. While the consequences might be shocking, grabbing a couple of these pomegranate seeds is acceptable on all diets.
Mega Cheese Roll
Have you ever wondered what giants eat? Here we have proof that giants like cheese. This might look familiar, like a certain cheese wrapped in red wax, but just giant-sized. Except it’s not. It’s a broken bowling ball. And it is not cheese at all (at least, we really hope not.)
Strangely bowling ball stuffing looks just the same as cottage cheese. Who would've guessed? It's one of those things you never really have to think about until a picture on the internet makes you. Let’s just hope people don’t figure this out and go on a trend of breaking bowling balls. However, it does bring to mind, how does one break a bowling ball?
Gummi Hippos
Is there new gummi hippo-shaped candy on the market? And which one is this? Raspberry or cherry flavor? No matter the flavor, we are keen. Especially since it is covered in crystal sugar. This is the product we have been waiting for – giant gummi hippos.
Except, we’re still going to have to wait for it. What we are, in fact, looking at is a crystal hippo-shaped soap. Soaps are another very non-edible product that is often made to look like delicious treats. Why does it exist? No reason, except just to keep disappointing fans of gummi sweets and hippos. They’re going to have to keep submitting requests.
Lake of Coffee
Sometimes you just wake up in the morning, and it is one of those days. And on such days, you can do nothing else but brew a whole lake of coffee. Fortunately for this man holding his mug, he has a lake-sized backyard with a handy bridge so he can get his first helping. Hey, if you woke up one morning and saw your backyard was flooded with gross brown water, you'd need a cup of joe too.
Or maybe, the rain gods paid a bit too much attention to the rain dances this month. Whatever the reason, the man in the photo holding the cup is going to need a lake-sized coffee cup to deal with all this muddy rain in his backyard.
Takeaway Spaghetti
Who doesn’t want takeaway spaghetti? There is no better way of enjoying the beach than to tuck into a heap of spaghetti piled into a cone. Okay, maybe spaghetti is not that great an alternative to ice cream, but then this picture begs the question – how did this heap of spaghetti end up on the beach?
Believe it or not, that’s actually not takeaway spaghetti. Those are the eggs of sea hares. And just so you know, sea hares do not look anything like normal hares. Instead, they look like snails. All of this is gross. And yes, nature is beautiful and a miracle blah blah blah - but don't lie to yourselves, this is icky.
All-Time Prank Chocolate-Chip Cookies
Is this what the future of choc-chip cookies looks like? Or are these simply glass and cup coasters sold at a mega-franchise? We’re going with the first one. First, because we’re hungry. And second, because they look delicious.
Just some advice: If you are considering buying these coasters to decorate your home, we’d advise against that. These coasters have too much resemblance to choc-chip cookies. Having guests over means you’d have to replace your coasters after every visit. Plus, it would just make them super hungry the whole time they are there. Buying delicious-looking coasters is just not going to work – unless you like playing pranks on your guests.
Orange Is Not Just a Fruit
Now, we know how painters create such beautiful still-life paintings of fruit. To do it, they use real fruit juice. We’re guessing the painter of this picture is working on the oranges right now, because he is on point with the color. The problem is that it is not orange juice. Fortunately, the painter in the picture stopped his wife from drinking the non-orange juice.
Even the original bottle from where the paint color came still makes you question whether it really is not orange juice. Guess there is no way of knowing because no one wants to accidentally drink paint-mixed water.
Noodle Basket
This person loves ramen so much that they decided to weave a basket from them. Or this might be a picnic or blanket basket. Perhaps, it is a disposal picnic basket. Just add water to the basket, and it becomes instant ramen noodles. It is a classic idea. Just make sure you pack in the seasoning. Oh, and don't keep anything valuable inside.
Now, this is taking picnicking to a whole new level. One thing, if you decide to use this disposal picnic basket as a meal too, make sure you bring plenty of mouths. You’re going to need them to finish this meal.
Teeny Tiny Noodles
Noodles come in all sizes and shapes. Introducing these teeny tines noodles. They are definitely the thinnest on the market. This is what happens when vermicelli goes on a diet. They’re perfect for those looking to shed a few kilos. Although, there are safer ways to do it than to consume this.
They even have that pale, faded look that most diet food has – the one that makes no one want to eat any diet food. Though the item in the picture is actually a sponge, it works for diets anyway. In fact, we’re pretty sure if you eat ten of these, you won’t put on any weight.
Chocolate Slab
Is this... Willy Wonka's garage? We’re not sure whether this garage is actually supposed to keep the owner’s vehicles safe. It seems more likely to do the opposite and attract unwanted visitors who are looking for a snack. What do you expect if you have a huge chocolate-shaped garage door?
Not saying it is a chocolate bar, but anyone walking past is bound to think that they have found the entrance to a particular chocolate factory. It is a bummer that it is not a garage-door-sized chocolate bar. We suppose this is why we read fantasy – one can only imagine.
A Thousand-Turtle Treat
It’s not exactly clear what we’re looking at here, but sometimes, it is better not to know. This could be either a very depressing meal or an extremely interesting one. For peace of mind, we’re going to say that these are intrinsically turtle-molded chocolate treats. More realistically, it looks like this is a bucket full of baby turtles, hopefully rescued.
Maybe, these treats were created specifically to be eaten on International Turtle Day – which is the 23rd of May. Or perhaps, chocolate-flavored cereal for turtle enthusiasts – the kinds of people who know that the 23rd of May is International Turtle Day.
Chocolate-Coated Incense
Without any hesitation, we can say that a combination of chocolate-coated biscuit sticks and incense will not be a hit. People don’t need nice-smelling chocolate. It is nice smelling enough. What would be a great combination, though, is a crossover between incense and sparklers. Plus, walking into a room smelling of chocolate? That sounds pretty heavenly, if you ask us.
Imagine how nice smelling sparklers will be if they have notes of jasmine, lemongrass, or sandalwood. The downside of that, however, is that you cannot eat it. Whatever is in this plastic wrapper, we’re guessing you can’t eat it either.
Flaming Burger Patty
Apparently, this is a fire starter. But the only thing these things have ignited is our appetites. Yet, since they are fire starters, they will probably burn a hole into our stomachs. It is probably best to stay away from these patties, if we're going to be completely honest.
Even if they were patties, you should still stay away from them. They have not been refrigerated. In that case, it is probably safer to eat the fire starters. What’s the worst that can happen? Indigestion? Acid reflux? Or an ulcer? Well, probably a list of things, and it's better to not dwell on them.
Condiment for Leather
This product may not be promoting barbecue sauce, but whatever it is doing, other barbecue sauces should be doing. It looks so tasty that regardless of whether it is a leather-care gel, we’ll drown our hamburgers and hotdogs in it.
Okay, that’s probably not a good idea, but you have to admit that the branding is superb… for a barbecue sauce. Especially with the Viking logo. Who wouldn’t feel empowered eating barbecue sauce with a Viking logo? We’re pretty sure if the Vikings got hold of this, they’d drench all their meals in it, knowing full well that this is leather cleaner.
Waxed Candy Balls
Whoever created the wording for this product, do they know that the stomach is part of the body? And that the mouth is part of the face? We’re not exactly sure what one does with face and body wax, but these wax balls are somewhat misleading. Especially with the name “Cosmic Candy,” this is a class-action lawsuit waiting to happen.
We understand that companies try to get a bit fancy with names, but they’re taking a bit too much of a chance with people's appetites. This retailer must see loads of people clutching their stomachs, groaning because they had one too many helpings of cosmic candy.